Life is Your Story

 I am walking along a path somewhere in the wilderness. I’m alone at first but then I feel someone’s presence, someone who vanished from my life. I think about all the people I have met and loved, yet there was nothing as intense, as omni-powerful as the connection of which I speak. Sometimes I wonder if some people are meant to only visit us once in our lives, because what they hold in their hands, their offering, is so sacred, so special that the moments of time, find it unbearable to hold onto them – to grasp them in their wholeness. So, I am on this walk and I have that feeling in my gut and I come around a bend and there he is, that person who vanished from this earth we walk upon and for whom I have waited to pass to the other side, so he can visit me in my dreams. But this is not a dream. This is not a hologram. This is not an illusion. This is him. This is what I have been waiting for, hoping for because I really never got to say a proper goodbye. I wasn’t there to kiss his for

Whether you married, whether you divorced, moved to another city, adopted a dog, adopted a baby, had children of your own, never had a child, parted company with a childhood friend, bought a house, sold a house, lost everything, found it all over again, really loved someone, took that pill that made it all go away and then took it again, had a drink and had another, lied so many times you no longer know the truth, said things you knew you shouldn’t have said, kissed someone that wasn’t yours to kiss and then wanted so much more than that kiss, brushed against someone in the grocery store that you never knew and will never know but fantasized about them that very night, lost a parent – a sibling – a partner and were left with a space that will never be filled, hid in someone’s arms and melted away, left someone standing with their heart in their hands… Some things stand out. The love you have for those who surround and love you. The career you have chosen and the passion you have for ev

    We all have events in our lives that imprint upon our memories. Some are happy, some are sad. We all have regrets of what was and what could have been. We all experience and surrender to love whether it is a lifetime commitment or a night of passion. Our memories are sparked by the scent of cooking, a song, a place we return to where we spent our childhood. While some of us walk a straight line (the job, the career, the partner, the kids, the house), others take detours. They travel the world, have various partners and live one day to the next.  The paths we take bring us to people and places where we settle, build a foundation and a LIFE THAT BECOMES OUR STORY. For over 20 years, I have been ghostwriting for those who want to share their life story. Whether in their twilight years or their prime, they all possess A SLICE OF BRILLIANCE.  Their life experiences are fascinating and through an intense interviewing process that takes sometimes a year or more, I am able to SCULPT AND SH

I went for a run. The rain was falling hard, the fog had set in. I came around a bend and a woman approached me. There was no one else in sight and she appeared as a silhouette carrying an air of grace. When she spoke I heard my Grandmother's voice and when I looked into her eyes, I saw a deep soulful speck of light from a moment in the past. My Grandmother had MS and was paralyzed from the neck down. She spent over 30 years in a hospital bed unable to move. In her 80's, she passed away from complications of pneumonia and I was thankful for that pneumonia because it had provided her with a long overdue end to the pain and suffering she had endured. We ran a few more blocks and then this strange spirit in the shape of a woman said, "I have to go now. I wish I could stay here with you." Then she vanished into the mist, into a place I've never been.                                                            Photo by James Wheeler I hope that anyone reading this who i

It’s Friday night and I am fully reclined on my Lazy Boy eating Miss Vickie’s Chips. I buy 3 different flavours and I mix them all into one bowl. I’ve substituted that for foreplay and so far it’s doing the trick. I’m watching Survivor (on demand) and the players are starving, sweating, dreaming of toilet paper, a burger, and fries. They are at one of those obstacle courses and Jeff is shouting the instructions. They don’t understand a single word, neither do I and I have shelter, air conditioning and a mouth full of chips. Now my Uber Eats has just arrived, I’m digging into my Cote St. Luc BBQ Chicken with those amazing fries (chips and fries = two sources of vitamin C in one night), there’s some gravy dipping going on and it’s the part of the show when those headless people demonstrate the obstacle course. Who are those people? How can I get that job? Also, why is everyone always wet and how do they suddenly have blazers and fedoras and hip clothing? Is there a retro shop on the isla

I’m lounging. It’s 7pm on a Friday night. The work week is done. I reward myself with Pad Thai (uh huh...from the box). I’m in my regular dining spot; my Lazyboy (digestion position - midway back). I’m watching TV while my dog watches me (he is familiar with my mediocre chopstick skills). I’m thinking, “This Pad Thai is delicious. What a great start to yet another exciting weekend” and then it happens:   The following is in slow motion… noodles covered in tiny pieces of peanuts on way to mouth – leap off the chopsticks onto   shirt Everything stops – my entire world – as I fathom what to do next. I could set my hand into “pickle claw” position and “pick” it from my shirt. I could remove the shirt altogether and change into another. Aaaaa....too much work - so I leave it on my shirt. I’m streaming “This is Us” so I know I am going to start crying at any moment and if I put it on pause then I’ll have to start crying all over again. Then it occur

I'm feeling 50 - I mean I am feeling it everywhere. I'm tired. I'm squinting. I say "oye" all the time. "Oye!" I'm trying to remember what foreplay is but all I can think of it as eating a bag of Miss Vickie's Salt Vinegar chips before watching Shark Tank (which I watch and shout out "I had that idea - I had that idea - damn!") I've lost my taste for food that has any taste because gas is a stark reality of feeling 50 so best to avoid it (the gas). I eat mostly bread and toast (which is bread toasted) and I usually find the time to fit in some danish or other bakery type product (which is delicious). I use to work out every day - I mean intense works outs. Now I get on the elliptical and my knee says "Oh don't do it - don't do it." And what on earth is happening to my neck? There are lines and creases and the skin is like butter - you hear me? Like butter!" I would cover it all up with a b

There’s that special friend and that sacred place -   a park, a cottage, a lake, a summer camp – where you grew up, experimented, built your foundation. You spoke of the life that you would make for yourself – the partner – the co-pilot – the kids – the career – the house – the travels – the stuff that makes you feel alive. When things weren’t going well behind closed doors – the family – the parents – the sibling – the knocking around – you met in this place and that friend took you home until things were better. And as the years went on and you met the partner, built the career, had the kids, the step kids, the dog, the cat, the house, the debt, the change in the partner that wasn’t really change at all – the one kid out of the 2 or 3 that struggled, that searched without finding, the hugs, the sighs, the “everything will be okay” even when you didn’t think everything would be okay. The mid-life crisis – the change in career – the affair or thought of t

Okay I get that the Bachelorette is all about young women who are in search of a husband - a wedding dress, starting a family and lots of french kissing but what about us middle aged single ladies? Here are the top 9 ways (and they are fascinating) that this middle aged, fed up, tired, bloated, tell it like it is Bachelorette would do stuff: 9 - the moment the cameras start to roll and those bright lights hit me - I am going to do one thing and one thing only - have a hot flash (and say "Oye I'm having a hot flash"). 8 - opening scene - forget the arrival by limo and i don't need 50 men - 9 for the picking will do - arrive walking your dog and when you first lay your eyes upon my mystical beauty ask "Who are you wearing?" and I will reply "Levis by Levi Strauss". 7 - settle into the mansion - and if this whole greeting process goes past 930PM then I am going to bed because I'm fed up, tired and bloated and they better have Netflix. 

I’ve watched love walk out the door And watched it march right back in again I’ve mourned the loss of love Wondering where things went wrong Knowing when things stopped being right Sometimes I imagine there is someone on their way to me They missed their flight or they are sitting on a bench in the pouring rain waiting for a bus. They are somewhere in the stillness, in the in-between, the this and that, the here and there. Sometimes you are with someone They share your home They share your bed They play an integral role in your life But you feel completely alone You wonder how much longer you can stay And what would happen if you left Alone in love or no love at all                                               Photo by Luis Alfonso Orellana If you’ve been in love You know that sweet spot When everything is off the charts Intertwined with a lover Kissing in the dark Your soul in the light Feasting on one another Leav