TOP 9 THINGS GOING DOWN WHEN I BECOME THE BACHERLORETTE
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Okay I get that the Bachelorette is all about young women who are in search of a husband - a wedding dress, starting a family and lots of french kissing but what about us middle aged single ladies? Here are the top 9 ways (and they are fascinating) that this middle aged, fed up, tired, bloated, tell it like it is Bachelorette would do stuff: 9 - the moment the cameras start to roll and those bright lights hit me - I am going to do one thing and one thing only - have a hot flash (and say "Oye I'm having a hot flash"). 8 - opening scene - forget the arrival by limo and i don't need 50 men - 9 for the picking will do - arrive walking your dog and when you first lay your eyes upon my mystical beauty ask "Who are you wearing?" and I will reply "Levis by Levi Strauss". 7 - settle into the mansion - and if this whole greeting process goes past 930PM then I am going to bed because I'm fed up, tired and bloated and they better have Netflix.